(I just got cancer) Struggling with chemotherapy and depression.
I have been having a wave of depression the last few days. I keep having so many ups and downs. I think it is from my last double dose of chemotherapy. The taxol and carbopentin just take so much out of me. When I get weak, I end up stressing and it works on me and I get depressed. I want to be able to do things, but my body just won’t cooperate. It is so upsetting. Of course I then let my anxiety get over me and I over stress on our financial problems. I know we all have financial issues, but right now I am freaking out as I see my children stressing on how to keep up with everything with them missing so much work. “I know I will get well and money will come, I know I will get well and money will come, I know I will get well and money will come”.
The weather is cooler which helps me. The heat was really making me feel wiped out. This week I am having a hard time walking and my legs are weak. I am somewhat concerned about my blood panel levels. I will get them done tomorrow and see my oncologist. I am not even half way into chemo, so I need to hang in there. I have to see the bright side of things and I do not have abdominal pain or nausea. If I need blood again, then that is just going to be what I have to do. I am getting neulasta to increase my white blood cells, aransp to increase my red blood cells and I have gotten two iron shots. I am hoping for good results tomorrow.
I wish everyone well,
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